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Women's Interfaith Encounter,
a
program of the Interfaith Encounter Association
28th March 2004
Monday morning I began preparations to travel to the North for our scheduled Learning Day for the WIE In the Galilee in Turan, the village of Randa Zarik Sabag, our Christian co-ordinator in the Galilee -- with Jews,Christians, Muslims studying "Honor Thy Mother" (the day before was the Arab Mother's Day) from the scriptures of the three religions. As the news started coming in about the assassination of Sheik Yassin by the Israeli Army, I started to receive phone calls being warned by friends not to travel on buses, not to go to an Arab village, not to talk with Arabs today, etc. etc. However, I refuse to allow terrorism to dictate my life choices (especially because my own son is a survivor of a terrorist suicide bombing) -- for me that would be a victory for terrorism -- and riding on buses is the defeat of terrorism. So I set out on the bus from Jerusalem at 11 a.m. for the 2:30 p.m. meeting. We were supposed to be 40 - 50 women meeting in a school, but Randa called to tell me that most of the Muslims (including our coordinator) and the Druze women called to say they weren't coming, because of the situation. They felt that because of the assassination, it was not the right time to dialogue. So Randa moved the meeting to her home to be more intimate.
The entire bus ride I was receiving phone calls from the various coordinators informing me about who was and wasn't coming. At one point there was some concern that we should postpone the meeting -- Randa said the Arabs didn't want to talk to Jews -- Piera Edelmen , our Jewish coordinator said that some of the Jews were afraid that there would be demonstrations , her mother called and was worried it would be dangerous. etc. I told them that I heard their concerns and understood and accepted the reluctance of some women to meet today -- but I reminded them that we must learn from our experience in Jerusalem: even when there are suicide bus bombings there, we never cancel a meeting -- we must not allow violence, terror, war, to deter us from our course of demonstrating that women can meet together in peace. So our process must continue and provide a safe space for whoever would be there to benefit from it. The coordinators agreed that our task was greater than our fears.
At the entrance to Turan two carloads of Jewish women met and drove together into Turan. We entered Randa's home carrying flowers, food, and a cake fresh out of the oven with a beautiful sweet aroma that filled the room. Randa and her sister-in-law and three daughters greeted us with hugs and kisses. Ibtisam Mahameed, our Northern Muslim coordinator was waiting there with Michal Fuchs, a Jewish friend who drove her there. We began speaking of the difficulty and pain she was feeling as a Muslim today, but her determination to be here and to continue with our work together. The Christian women were beginning to arrive. One came over smiling and happy and saying "Happy Holiday. Happy Mother's Day". Ibtisam and I were startled by her cheery greeting -- but somehow it brought us back to the reality of the goal of our meeting -- mothers giving and getting strength from each other -- and I was impressed with the way Ibtisam put her struggles aside and entered into the atmosphere of our meeting. The room kept filling with women bringing food, greeting each other, feeling relief to arrive safely and find other women willing to be together today.
Randa opened with greetings and a circle of introductions. We regretted that our British donor was unable to be with us because he had been refused entry at the airport and we were very grateful for his generosity and support for interfaith women building peace together. We acknowledged the importance of people abroad being aware of our situation and willing to strengthen us to do this holy work. Everyone spoke in their own language and Randa translated into Hebrew or Arabic. In the end we were 8 Jews, 12 Christians, and 2 Muslims -- a tiny microcosm struggling to be open and sane and understanding towards each other. We spoke about the significance of continuing with our process in spite of what was going on --acknowledging the difficulty, pain, and dangers that each experienced coming here today -- and validating the strength and support that we get from each other. The test of our work is not that we get together when times are good, but that we continue when times are bad. We did a paired exercise with someone of another religion that we did not know -- telling them about ourselves and what it meant to meet together today. The room immediately filled with the buzz of so many intimate conversations as women leaned towards each other and looked deeply into each other's eyes and listened intently. By the time we'd finished, a web of connection had been woven among us -- and it felt like a safety net.
Next we studied "Honor Thy Mother" first from the Jewish sources, starting with the Fifth Commandment and the commentaries on it, by Anat Israeli, a teacher of Jewish Philosophy from Oranim college. She pointed out that this Commandment comes in the middle of the Commandments between Man and God, and between Man and Man, acting as a transition because Honoring your Parents is like Honoring God. Sister Carmela, a Catholic nun from Reme Village taught from the New Testament about Jesus' reverence for his mother, reading "A Woman of Valor" from King Solomon's Proverbs, and stressing the emphasis on women in Jesus life and acts. Ibtisam had prepared the Muslim teaching, since she knew the Muslim Sheika was not coming -- and she told us how a man asked the Prophet Mohammed what was the best way to go straight to heaven and he answered, "Honor your father and your mother." When he asked which he should do first, the Prophet answered three times "Honor your mother" and only the fourth time answered "Honor your father". The informality of the situation enabled women of the same faith to offer their own contributions as the teachers spoke. There were questions for each of the teachers and further comments from many of the women. We then broke for the delicious refreshments that all the women had brought and prepared. One Muslim woman had brought her six-month old baby -- who was so adorable that everyone was smiling and holding him -- and so happy to have this tiny representative of the future and the goal of our work -- to provide a better world for him to grow up in.
Afterwards we broke into three small discussion groups. In one group, women spoke of the difficulty of knowing how to respond to children or parents who express racist attitudes . Jewish women quoted from a Midrash about God reprimanding the angels who celebrated when Pharoah and his men were drowned at the Red Sea -- saying that they could not rejoice when His creatures were perishing. She spoke of the importance of gently reminding our families of these teachings when they express hatred to the Other. A Muslim woman spoke of the importance of being an example to our children and demonstrating our willingness to keep our hearts and our minds open to each other -- to teach our children how to be different in this situation. A Christian woman spoke of the importance of individual daily prayer as a significant simple action that each of us can take to model religious behavior to our families and to strengthen the energies of peace. I remembered the recent medical study that showed that hospital patients that are prayed for have much more significant rates of recovery than ones who aren't prayed for. I had this image of our region as a giant sick and suffering person -- and that if all us could really pray with all our strength for this seriously ill patient, perhaps we could bring about a recovery and restore it to healthy functioning!
In another group, the discussion focused on dealing with children who chose to live in their own way and do not follow the political or religious path of their mother. Everyone agreed that the mother can make suggestions or requests, but cannot force the child to follow her way -- and the child can still honor his parents in his relationship with them. Practical suggestions were that the Jewish children should all learn Arabic in school, that all Israeli citizens should have equal rights.
We closed our meeting with Piera singing and accompanying herself on the guitar with a hauntingly beautiful song she had written praising and acknowledging her mother for all she been given by her. Everyone was very moved as it was translated and they reflected on their own relationships with their mothers. One woman was crying and said she would go home and call her mother in the U.S. We did a closing meditation focusing on all we had received from our individual mothers, on all we had received from each other on this difficult day, and urging everyone to express their appreciation to each other. The room was immediately filled with embraces, kisses and hugs, and words of love and parting. We were aware of how saddened and shook up we are by the madness around us, how hard it is to process it all -- and anticipating much worse to come -- but we had been able to have this brief respite -- to relax into such harmony and respect for 4 hours in the midst of it all. We were all very grateful that we have created a process that can be a light to dispel some of the darkness of the politics and violence of our region -- accenting the power and truth of religion to unify and bring tolerance to all.
Love,
Elana Rozenman
Women's Interfaith Encounter
Interfaith Encounter Association
This report was prepared with the assistance of Piera Edelman, Ibtisam Mahameed, Randa Sabag
The Interfaith Encounter Association
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